What’s Next after the Hurt


It’s the first day of the second month of the year. How have you been advancing on your goals? Have you tried some moves but got hurt in the process? What should we do after getting hurt?

I am reminded of a song that I first learned to sing with a guitar. Man, I just loved it. I enjoyed singing the song while strumming my guitar. The first part goes this way:

“There was no moon that night but the light in your eyes pulled out my heart and turned the tide, I was carried away, now all I do is pray that someday you’ll stay right by my side.

But it’s out of my hands; I have no control of where love will lead us on this winding road. But if I had my way, I’d be your man. I’d give all I have and all I can. So I’m letting go ‘cause inside I know, it’s out of my hands.”

It’s the song of David Kersh called ‘It’s Out of My Hands’.

I like how he started the song poetically. Somehow, I can relate as I recall that moment when I was carried away as I looked at the beautiful lady across the hall.

But then the twist came as he said that it’s actually out of his hands. He said he has no control. But if he had his way, he would give all he had and all he could. The previous statement would have been so powerful but then he concluded that he is letting go because deep within, he knows that it is out of his hands.

On the next stanza of the song, as I would interpret it, his stance was actually brought about by his previous experience. In the past, he held on because he thought he was strong but only to find out he was wrong. Perhaps, he was hurt. He may have loved but the lady did not love him back. He reasoned there is nothing he can do to make her feel that way too. Hence, the conclusion that it was out of his hands.

This song may be good to sing for a while but not a song to live by for a lifetime. I have nothing against the artist. I actually still sing this song sometimes. I do not claim that I understand what the artist might have gone through in his relationship that inspired this song. It is such a creative piece. But in this article, I am using it as a simple analogy.

We may have been hurt in the past and it is just normal to feel the hurt and maybe even cry for a while. We may have been rejected in the past – it may be when courting a girl or presenting a business proposal or in trying to get through that job interview or in attempting to hurdle that difficult exam – whatever it may be, it’s OK to feel the hurt and even sing your heart out for a while. You may even say that it’s out of your hands – for a while. But this should only be for a while and not for a lifetime.

There shall come a time that that pill of pain expires. There shall come a time that you get up and take action after the hurt.

Feel the hurt of having been rejected. Feel the hurt of having failed. Feel the hurt of any painful experience. But let that be only for a while. Get back into the scene and act on your goals once again.

It may be true that it is almost always out of our hands, but it is still in our hands.

So what’s next after the hurt? It is the next move. Let’s keep going.